Sunday, June 24, 2018

Sometimes Giving Up On Someone Is The Only Option....

Now don't take the title the wrong way because when it comes to my life I am not giving up but when it comes to certain people in my life I am shutting the door that has been held open for much too long.  I had held hope and faith that my soon to be ex-husband would come around and realize what he is doing to me but to our family. I had held faith that I could save my marriage. I spent the last week sick because of my allergies and sinuses and have been barely able to get out of bed. Do you know who took care of me the whole time? Myself and my kids. Every time he would be around there would be nothing but sly remarks and crude comments.  My own son has made the comments that his dad is not acting like a dad should.  That shocked me a bit that my eleven-year-old can see what is right and what is wrong along with my fourteen-year-old but a forty-year-old man can't.  Now you may ask why am I bringing this up? Because I made the mistake that I hope other ladies can learn from.

Seriously ladies and gentleman learn from my mistake.  If the person you love treats you like crap and you know you are doing nothing wrong then there is probably something going on behind the scenes.  In my case, he is adamant that there is not however from private sources that know us both I have been informed that he hasn't been faithful to me since he has come back since our separation and that makes a ton of sense considering if you haven't got a promotion you have been working on since you came back they are not testing you after three years they are using you... or your lying about where you have been. In the case of our marriage, he has been lying.

Another good indicator you need to end the relationship you are in is when you get blamed for stuff that you know you could not have done.  See my soon to be ex-blames me for everything.  When I say everything I mean everything.  My oldest will post pictures and videos of our Granddaughter to social media and it's my fault that he doesn't get to see it because he does not do social media. Now I understand that he doesn't like social media but when you are one of the only family members on both sides of the family who is not on social media don't expect our daughter to make a special exception just for you. Acting like an entitled asshole is one of the many reasons we are in this position now.  I even tried being nice and would show him and he is like I am busy... while playing a video game.  But it's my fault.

I have four other children my seventeen and eighteen years old have joined on the dad bandwagon. Why do I mention this because I have talked to him about how the teens talk to me and he asked what is he supposed do. I asked him to please have them stop to which he is like nope. For everyone who has known him for years, this is part of his manipulation ploy.  He did this when we had separated last time as well. My girls were younger than and realized what he was doing was wrong now they are at the age where they are moving out soon and he hands them whatever they want so they don't care.  I hope one day they will open their eyes to what he is doing because its wrong,  The way they are acting is wrong.  I love my teens and I will never give up on them it just hurts a lot.  But all of this is my fault.

I have had to start a go fund me page HERE!  Why because I need to get my little kids to a drama free zone and because I am seriously worried that their dad is planning something bad and I don't want them to become casualties of his so-called revenge against me.  I have even got to the point that I have to record any conversations he has against me because I am afraid of what he is going to do. (I tell him that the conversations are being recorded so he knows and as he has threatened to have me put in jail on multiple times when I called and asked the local sheriff what I should do this was the suggestion from them to cover my own ass.

This post was because I had have been asked privately whats been going on so I figured an update was in order. I am trying to get back into my regularly scheduled crazy and happy content.  I am currently working on new material that should be out daily soon.

Peace and Love,


Monday, June 18, 2018

You Are Special So Follow Those Dreams!

That's right REMEBER THE ABOVE! But seriously I am writing this because of the amount of shaming that goes on.  I am not even talking Mom shaming which is a horrible thing as it is but I am talking shaming in many different aspects. I am actively pursuing my writing and crafting, My Ex is constantly telling me as well as having our teens and his mom saying that I will never make it that it's just a dream that I shouldn't pursue.  Well, I say bull dung to that. My sister-in-law Pam used to joke with me that I should open a food truck that sold nothing but cookies, milk, coffee, and tea. To be honest I have considered it on and off for about six months but then decided I liked my writing and crafting a bit more than baking twenty-four seven. 

I am a firm believer in following my dreams and I am doing my best to pursue them regardless of what kind of negative comments I get.  Am I saying no I will not get a real job to support my children and myself of course not! I know I have children to care for but with careful planning and juggling, I believe I can keep all the balls in the air until I succeed in my dreams.  That is why I am becoming an advocate of following your dreams and reaching your life goal! I already self-published two books and I am working on a new one as well which if all goes well will be published on Amazon by the end of July!  Would I succeed in what I am doing if I listened to the naysayers in my life? I think not.

So my encouragement to everyone else believe in yourself and do what you think is right in your life. Take those first few baby steps and follow your dreams because the only person who is holding you back is yourself.  At the end of the day, the person you have to answer to for all your unrealized dreams is yourself. So look in that mirror give yourself the pep talk you need and work on your goals!  Now I am not saying quit your job to be a wood carver, but taking an hour or two a day to devote to your projects are an amazing thing if you are truly serious about it! Want to sell your wares post them on your local community sell site.  There is always a yes out there depending on how dedicated you are to your goals.

I hope as short as this is that maybe I lifted someones spirit and believe me when I say you are not alone we believe in you! There are moms and dads out there struggling with the want and need to pursue their goals.

Blessings and Love,

Sunday, June 17, 2018

New Writing Adventure!

When you were a kid do you remember the choose your own adventures book? Well, I was talking to a friend of mine the other day and she said she wished there were adult versions of the choose your own adventure books. Why not I need a distraction from the novel I am writing once in a while so I decided to start one.  Why not right? The intro page is up and I am adding the link ==>

However, I am giving only one warning this is not a sunshine and roses type of adventure.  The deeper the rabbit hole goes there is a bigger possibility that it will become much darker.  The thing is you can end the book at any moment as well depending on which choice you make. I always liked a good adventure what about you?

Tuesday, May 29, 2018


Okay so a few months ago my subscriber count went from a nice number that made me happy to zero.  I contacted google and they sent me a new gadget to add to my blog but still nothing. So since I was in such a great mood already I decided to contact google again and this time after the nice tech talking me through everything and literally going through the process in baby steps we finally(hopefully) figured out what the problem was. Drumroll, please....... They sent me the wrong gadget originally. So if you subscribed before I am sorry but I think we are finally fixed. Finally, I tested it with my own email and it seems to work now. I will be posting videos crafts and as always updates for the blog right here all you have to do is hit FOLLOW ===>
Just remember to verify it in case you contact me I can contact you back.

Because seriously the last 24 hours have been rough!

Friday, May 25, 2018

The Moon

"She was devoted to the moon

In it's darkness she found comfort

In its light she found hope"

-her thoughts 36

No matter what the season or how hot or cold it is there is nothing better than laying on a blanket watching the moon.

"Instead of being someones sun, be their moon and light up their most dark of times."

"No matter where we are in the world we are all looking at the same moon"

Even in the most dark of times there will always be moonlight to guide our way home. Never give up! Never give in! There is always a moon there to guide you.

--you are never alone
1-800-273-8255 or text 741741--

Monday, May 21, 2018


So I will admit I am struggling so much with things in my life right now. Seriously I am an adult and I should not have to struggle with people telling me I am not going anywhere and I am going to fail. Especially when it's me soon to be ex-husband or teenage daughters. You're all probably wondering why I am saying something. Because I know I am not the only person going through this right now and I know a lot of us ladies are going to hell. When my husband and I separated back in 03 I made enough money with my freelancing and crafting plus my job that supported my kids and me without my soon to be ex. My kids had what they needed and I did it on my own. Now those same kids are telling me that it's not good enough. REALLY ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!  This upsets me so much because these are the two teens who are now besties with dad because he would rather be their friend instead of their parent and let them do whatever they want. Well, I say no more. I work hard and have finally started making progress on both my freelance, blogging/writing and crafting/resale store. Ladies the only person who can decide your path is you so do just that.

However, let me give you some advice confront what people say head on because there are going to be haters. My soon to be ex-MIL tells everyone all these horrible things about myself and my home and people believe her because she is a fake Christian. (My home is in the midst of being remodeled by me!) My home needs TLC which I am slowly doing with the cleanout and remodel. As for the hate rumors I admit I eat my feelings. I gained 50 pounds since all this started and am only now starting to lose the weight. My weight has always been a struggle because I love to eat although I am active stress keeps the weight on. That and topped with a hernia and emotional issues I am lucky I have not gained more.

Most of all ladies you need to love yourself. I will admit I am overweight, my hair needs to be done, oh and my eyebrows need a waxing. I admit I have slacked and I am not one to preach it when I look like hell but tomorrow I am dedicating the day to taking care of myself! Because I am worth it and I don't care who says otherwise.

But most of all ladies remember that there will be times where people will try to hurt you and make you cry. It's hard to trust me I know. When my ex is home I have to hold in the tears and pray that none of them drop.  I can honestly say I was thrown away by the man I love not once but twice. But for me what's worse is he has also taught my 17 and 18 to do the same to not only me but to my youngest daughter because she told him and them that she doesn't approve of what he has done. It will get better ladies I promise! I have 1 guy in my life I can trust and that's the little boy who calls me mommy!  Despite being thrown away by my husband I still am a hopeless romantic and hope that one day I will find someone who will love me for me.

Well, all that's enough sap for now!
Till next time
Love and Blessings,

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

Whats Your Favorite Scary Movie?

I was actually watching a youtube video based on an old-school scary movie and realized that my kids are now old enough to watch the scary movies that I grew up on!

Beware there will be affiliate links so you can see which movies or their book I am talking about!

I was so happy because it takes a lot to scare my kids but also it is a coming of age thing for them as well! 
So whats your favorite scary movie? Do you have that one movie you have to wrap yourself in a blanket to watch? My favorite scary movie by far has been and always will be THE SHINING! Seriously Jack Nicholson coming through the door with the ax saying "Heres Johnny", Is my favorite horror scene of all time.
My first horror book was The Shining and I later picked up the sequel to it Dr. Sleep! (BTW if you have a teen or preteen who likes to read Dr. Sleep is on my no read list as it's not for the preteen crowd.)  Movies based on Steven King's books basically head up my list of scary movies! 

The next scary movie series I love is the 
Who cannot forget hearing the ominous song start ... "One Two Freddy's coming for you!"
I mean these movies are such a hit they brought Freddy back in a new movie in 2010!

Then you all have our Friday The 13th, Jason Movies!
Seriously Jason can't be killed they even rebooted the series in 2009! Camp Crystal Lake we thank you for bringing us Jason and come on everyone Jamie Lee Curtis as Jason's sister in the later movies!

Heck Even Freddy and Jason fight in out the movie

Then lets not forget these awesome solo movies,
Or these scary franchises that started up since the big boys up there took the screen:

Woman In Black Franchise
The Haunting Franchise
The Conjuring Franchise

So do you like any of these movies? Which movies scare you? Let me know in the comments below!