Saturday, August 17, 2019

The Importance Of Mom Care!


That's right ladies and gentleman this is your reminder on the importance of self care. You know, in case the people in the back can't hear me. That being said I do need to state that I am not a professional. I just have many years experience in the art of not doing self care and the journey I had to take to realize the importance. So shall we begin? Okay, good grab a cup of tea and let's get started!

THE GUILT!

Yes, as a mom you are going to feel guilt anytime you try to do anything for yourself. Guess what that is normal, but believe me it will be worth it. If you have a partner in your life they can help a bit so you can better yourself. If you're a single mom like I am then there are ways around this. When my kids were little any time I had to do self care was once the kids were asleep. My ex never helped with the kids so I made time after I knew they would be sleeping. Guess what everyone this is important for you to hear, The dishes and laundry can wait. That's right, you are more important. I had it berated into me for such a long time by Ex Mother-In-Law that I suffered through a bunch of young mom guilt. But then I was schooled by some amazing people that I needed to take care of myself for my kids. Once I started to realize my own self worth the guilt started to slowly go away.

The Different Types Of Self Care!

There are many ways for a mom to take care of themselves. Some people will laugh at some of them, but believe me I would not mention it unless it's important and have seen it help people. So shall we begin?

Getting Rid of the CLUTTER!!

Did you know that a mess and unorganized home can trigger anxiety and depression? It's true. This example I can attest to because that is how people who really love and pay attention to me know when I am struggling. Ladies, if you have a friend you feel is struggling help that girl out! I have visited friends and just did a sink of dishes or helped fold a basket of laundry.  If you have a friend who just had a baby or has a bunch of little ones. Don't go over uninvited but text and say hey, let me come clean up for you! You will probably get that mom weeping tears of joy! Mom's who help each other are our best asset. 

Get to Know Your Fellow Moms!

Getting to know your fellow moms and making friends is an important part of self care. You need people in your life who know what you're going through and are willing to listen.

I was recently told of a group of ladies who do female bonding by choosing one day a week and going to each others home while the kids are in school or camp and helping each other clean up. Can you imagine the love and compassion in this group. I asked how this worked and it was explained 1 mom had a van that can hold all 10 of these amazing ladies. They meet up and get a coffee before they start their day. They go house to house and clean up by dusting sweeping or  mopping. Most houses take as little as 15-30 minutes between them. An since they all live locally to each other they can get a good clean working together. 

I was also told this mom's group also does a huge meal prep session at a rented kitchen once every few months. They go shopping first thing on a Friday and cook together all weekend and come up with about 30 freezer meals each from soups to full meal prep bagged together for quick dinners. As the meals are finished, they are put in boxes with everyone's family name on it. I asked what about people who are picky eaters? I was told no one is picky during this as they decide via email what meals to prep during this time, so they can gather a shopping list and every family contributes. I was shocked by how well they work together. She said for them spending that time together helps them as moms vent and learn new things. Since their group is small they get to have a great time. Plus free up some time so they can be with their families more!. 

Having You Time!

Having time alone is an important thing. Here are some examples of how mom's I have spoken to take their alone time to the next level! Sorry I do not mention names as I like to give privacy to the ladies I talk to! Below is a list of what moms do to get their fun time. Some are quoted some are examples.

"I take a book, a cup of coffee and drives to the local boat dock. There is a breeze most of the time and I just reclines my seat and reads for an hour.  It's the perfect me time. **

"I go to the gym and work out for a while!"

"I go thrift store shopping and look for great deals! Some people laugh at me, but I up-cycle things for shows and resale and I enjoy finding new treasures to do this. Plus, once in a while I find items on the cheap that I resale for a great profit!"

"I take long walks while listening to music!"

"As much as I love my family I got the movie pass and go and see a movie once a week by myself. I do not care if its an old or new movie I just chill out and watch the screen. I have even fallen asleep during the movie and took a nap!"

"Go out to eat by myself! I try the restaurants that no one wants to go to!"

Taking Care Of Yourself!

Ladies you need to take care of yourself! Get in that shower, Pluck those eyebrows, Dye that hair if you feel so inclined. If you don't feel good about yourself, how are you to stay positive and be a better mom. So what does that mean if you have a handful of rug rats running around? Well, it might mean that you are going to have to take care of yourself once they are in bed. Or trade babysitting with another mom who is in the same situation! Don't be afraid to say listen I need a few hours to take care of myself. Most moms are in the same situation.  Or if you want, hire a local sitter and go get it done professionally.  The most important thing is you need to take care of you. 

Mama's do not include this in your you time. If you have a spouse or a partner at home, I am guessing they get to shower peacefully so you should be able to too!

Working Out!

First and foremost, this is not me saying moms are overweight or unhealthy. Mom's need to physically take care of themselves to be these best you you can be!  Working out has proven benefits to ward off anxiety and depression. I am not saying get a gym membership! Personally, I take 5 mile walks as often as I can. Because of my walking I have lost 60 pounds  and it has helped my overall outlook in life. It also gives me time to just chill out and not think. 

Lovey Lovey Time!

Let me state first and foremost, I am no sexual health expert. However, ladies, you need to take care of yourself in this area as well. If you embarrass easily go ahead and skip to the next section I am the odd ball who is a bit old fashion and believes that sex should be in a committed relationship.  That being said, men are not the only people who have a sex drive. Ladies you need to take care of yourself in this area! You need to learn your body, What you like and dislike because you need to know what pleases you or how will you be able to share this with your partner!

Well, that's about it for now all! I am sure I missed a whole bunch of subjects and side topics I could have touched upon! If you feel I did please feel free to comment below. Mom's you are not just a by product of having a child. You are strength, love, beauty and a goddess!

Blessings and Love,

Angie






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